*Disclaimer: Long, emotional, and no pics.
I know I haven't posted anything about being pregnant, or BGW (Baby Girl Walk)#2. One person actually asked me if we were joking about the pregnancy...and I laughed a lot. I just thought it was so funny because it didn't surprise me that people would wonder since I haven't said anything about it! Even the post announcing the pregnancy was done by Cody, who has blogged maybe 3 times in his whole life. I'm a little surprised by myself, honestly, that I haven't said anything. But I just dont' really know what to say.
I'm 33 weeks (and one day) along, so I have about 7 weeks left of being pregnant. I can't even imagine what having a baby will be like again. I don't know why, but I feel like I'll just be pregnant forever and the baby will never be born. Right now, I'm kinda ok with that. That sounds so mean, but it's just because Chloe is still my baby! She's still so little and I feel like she needs so much attention and I'm trying to teach her so much...I'm scared that'll all change once the new baby is here.
When my family was here for Chloe's birthday, Amy and I were talking about BGW#2 and she said she had talked to her other friend who had 2 kids close together about how I'm worried Chloe won't get enough attention anymore...She said her friend said to not worry at all about the first one, it's the second one that doesnt get the attention!
Even though I've had 8 months to get used to the idea of having another baby, it still hasn't set in that it's really happening. I'm excited to have her, but when I think about the actual labor -- just Chloe not being there..not me actually being in labor--, and think about introducing her to Chloe, it really freaks me out. I know this is so stupid. I just think ok, I'll have this new baby and Chloe will be at home, maybe away from me for a whole day..Or even more (!) while we're in the hospital, and it just breaks my heart. seriously dumb, but I'm even crying now! I'm just so scared about the whole thing. I want Chloe to like her and be soft with her...But the only person (dog) she has to be soft with now is Junior and she still hits him pretty hard! She's just so little and doesn't get it yet! And I can't expect her to!
Ugh. When we first told Cody's grandparents we were having another baby his grandma was so excited and was like-Oh!!! I had two babies 14 months apart! Did you cry when you found out?! I said yes, and she was like-So did I!!!!!! So I know I'm not the only one that's felt like this before...And Doug and Perry turned out really good for being so close! So I'm hoping Chloe and BGW#2 turn out good, too :)
So I'm due December 23. I really like my Dr. I went to my first Dr in Rexburg --didn't really like the dr but loved the midwife-- but then we moved. So I found another dr in Newport and he was soooooo rude to me. I LOVED his waiting room, (the walls were all pale yellow and the furniture was all white wicker...I dont' know why I loved it so much, but I did) but luckily I'm not crazy enough to stay with a dr just because of his waiting room. SO I found a new dr and really, really like him. His whole family (wife and 2 daughters) work with him and his wife is so sweet. AND when I told him I'm from Illinois he was like-Oh, home of the Fighting Illini! I (honestly, I'm not even joking) almost started crying. I held it back in his office, but that's when I knew he should be the one.
We haven't picked a name yet..We have 2 or 3 that we like but haven't decided on one yet, and probably won't until she's here. I really want to keep the names a secret, but Cody thinks that's lame. Luckily for me he hasn't told anyone...that i know of... So it's still a secret! I just think it's exciting when a baby is born and you dont know what the name was going to be...You're just like-YEAH! A baby is here and now we can find out what it's name is! So that's what I'm going for.
One special thing about this baby...I feel like she's mine. With Chloe, Cody and I were both just so excited we couldn't think or talk about anything else. With this baby it's a lot more laid back because we just did this like 2 seconds ago. When she first started moving and you could feel it on the outside, I was the only one that could feel her with my hand for like a week. I would tell Cody and he'd run over to feel, but by the time he would get there she'd stop. I felt like she was just doing it for me and it was our special thing. Also, when I was pregnant with Chloe I felt like she was so girly and I don't really feel like that with this one. I feel like she's totally going to be her own person and want to do her own thing with her own ideas. So we'll see if I'm right! (In like 15 years... :) )
SO that's that about the baby news. It's true, we ARE having another one (and soon!) So now you know!!
PS DON"T forget we're going private on Saturday! (Only 2 more days!!!!!) If you sent me a message or left a comment on here and DIDN'T post your email, I don't have it!! (Unless it's you, mom. I have your email.) Please leave another comment or let me know somehow what your email is, because I don't really know how to invite you otherwise. Thanks!!!